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Schizoaffective disorder is a beast. If I’m not anxious, paranoid, or reliving trauma, I’m reeling from all three of these at once. I have to battle these effects on several fronts. Medically, emotionally, spiritually, physically, socially… My emotional state is usually wonky, but that’s the bipolar of it, sometimes I’m on top of the world, and other times I’m in the depths. The voices from the schizophrenic part of my illness are largely taken care of, not entirely, but most

Something finally clicked for me. We are always looking for the extraordinary, but of course God is hidden in the ordinary things of everyday life. We may say, “oh the sunset is so beautiful,“ but there’s a sunset every single day all around the world. And even on distant worlds. Flowers, dirt, birds, a wood floor, a footstool, a piece of art. All of these things happen every single day and happen over and over. We hardly even notice them. The beauty of music just becomes noi

I find that wherever there is a strict adherence to doctrine, there is a separation from the validity of the human person. We’re not all supposed to be exactly the same, and homogenized by asceticism, or morality, or what I call “hard doctrine.“ We need to be more fluid as we approach our awakening. I think it was Bruce Lee, who wrote the book Be Like Water. That title has always intrigued me and recently I have come to appreciate fluidity in a spiritual sense. I’m sure the b

First of all, hello. I haven’t blogged in a while, namely because I’ve been working on the book. I’ve had a difficult weekend. I dreamt of my grandmother Friday morning. She seemed nervous to see me, and she gave me a gift. It was great to see her, but I got the sense that she was sad, because she was finally leaving this world. I could tell that she was stressed over “final judgment,“ which brings me to the purpose for this blog post. Let’s not fear eternity. The longer we t